Finding my Purpose…

I have been working on my personal relationship with God a lot this year so far. It wasn’t one of my New Year’s resolutions nor did I just wake up one morning and say “you know… I really need to pray more…” though I should!  I feel I’ve lost myself somewhere along this journey of life and I tend to find more pieces of me when I reach within and when I walk with God.

Each morning I recite a specific paragraph to Judson (I’ve written about it it in previous posts) My hope is one day he recites it back to me with confidence and conviction; knowing and believing the words that he speaks. Well… he won’t know that confidence and conviction if he never hears it that way from me. So I decided to really absorb those words. Sure I’ve memorized them; but do I KNOW them? Do I BELIEVE them? Am I SPEAKING them?

Then I started noticing prayer requests; I’m sure I saw them all the time but now I am paying attention. And the thought crossed my mind… “What if this grace, this favor, this blessing, this healing, this miracle is just one prayer away from happening but I am too busy to pause?” So going forward, even if it’s quickly and quietly in my head, even if I haven’t a clue what I am praying for… I will take a prayer pause.

After awhile I realized my silent wishes, my hopes, my complaints and frustrations throughout the day turned into conversations. I wasn’t blabbing along to myself anymore, I was finding comfort and guidance in Jesus… He found me again, or should I say… I found him again.

I’ve always had a relationship with Jesus.  Unfortunately I stray more often than not. I get lost and scared, I get stubborn and angry, I throw a temper tantrum and place blame; but I am always forgiven and led back in the right direction while wrapped in love and acceptance.

What an AMAZING God!   Can I get an AMEN!?

I am a Christian, I have faith but I am not one to “shout it from the rooftops”.  Some may say many of my actions and behaviors do not fall in line and that may be what I work on next… shouting from the rooftops does sort of sound fun… But for now I am selfishly working on my personal relationship; and while focused on what sometimes seems like tedious work, a word keeps popping out at me… PURPOSE.  I hear it or read it almost on a daily basis.

Purpose – the reason for which something is done or created or for which something exists.

If I don’t watch out I’ll end up with an imprint or a bruise that spells it out because God is really trying to get through to me.  I hear you now, sorry for the delay…

For example my last journal entry, dated 4/1/18:

“When you lead a passionate life you are living your life on purpose. To lead a purposeful life, follow your passions.”

I am on a journey to find my purpose(s) and I will find it through my passions. I want to achieve more, experience spiritual growth and live the life I was purposed for.